A Reminder.
Sometimes it just doesn't feel right to publish trivial posts that were planned (i.e new additions to my makeup bag is a post that should've gone up on Friday, and the best pieces for layering, today). Sometimes things happen that make you reevaluate life, what you're doing and how you're living, even if that something doesn't directly affect you. Sometimes life is just too damn short.
It's a cliche to say that, right? Along with 'you only live once' and 'you never know what's around the corner' but they're such cliches because they're true. We do only live once, we don't know what could happen to any of us next week, month, year, or even tomorrow. And life really is too damn short.
Because that Economics degree needs to be put to use in some way or other, I'm gonna refer you to Maslows hierarchy of needs. As long as you have food, water and shelter (and your health) everything else can be figured out with time. It doesn't matter that you're still living at home with your parents wishing you had your own place; it doesn't matter that you don't have a car, an SO or kids on the way like seemingly everyone else your age. Focus on enjoying what you do have, and doing something that makes you happy. Every. Single. Day. Even if that's not your job right now. Even if it's only for half an hour a day.
It's far easier said than done to just 'stop sweating the small stuff', especially if you have anxiety like me, it seems almost impossible. But here's a few changes I want to start making:
Reach out to those friends you don't speak to enough
Because of my anxiety, and because of how busy I make myself, I barely ever find myself reaching out to any of my friends. I always feel that they might not actually like me, or want to be my friend, but tbh I need to stop caring. If they don't like me then they won't want to go for pizza next week and that's ok, because it just means more pizza for me. But I'll look back one day and regret not making the most of my friendships while I'm young.
Get rid of those friends who hurt you
You know the ones, who pass everything off as a joke, who never actually mean to upset you, but do anyway. Who only get in touch when they want something. I don't want to waste my time nor energy on people who don't truly care about me.
Tell the people you love, that you love them
Simple, right? It would be if you don't have such a fear of speaking about feelings and all that gross, mushy stuff! Even if it's just telling your mum that you love her at the end of a phonecall - it'll make you both happy.
Loves. Emma.
Learning To Love Yourself
Confidence is something that I have always, always lacked. I remember being in year 6 at primary school and my teacher said she wanted me to be Mary in the school Christmas play (we hadn't even done auditions) and the thought of being the centre of attention so much just freaked me out; I burst into tears and told her no. After I calmed down, she then asked if I'd like to be the main narrator. Opening the whole production? No thanks. Eventually we agreed I'd be narrator number 3 with minimal lines. Growing up with anxiety and extreme shyness is the absolute worst for your confidence. Obviously getting older, confidence grows naturally, but not always a great deal. I'm not good at putting myself out there (in fact, thats quite the understatement!) and when so-called friends put you down for being shy, it only pushes you back.
I mentioned in my post all about the benefits of having a blog, that possibly the best thing is the confidence which it has given me. Not only the confidence to wear the outfits that I want to wear, but in life in general. And not only does this come from the ~community and getting so many supportive comments, but from constantly seeing and editing photos of myself. I've always hated having my photo taken and would hide in the back of group photos at every opportunity - but now I don't so much! Yes I still have days where I hate myself and don't even want to look in the mirror, never mind have photos taken of myself, but thats ok. When I take a step back and look how far I've come, it amazes me tbh.
One thing that my mum has always said about me is that I'm my one worst enemy; I'm super critical of everything that I do. I was never satisfied that any of my school work was good enough (even if I was getting top marks in the class) and am especially hard on myself if I feel that I've been lazy or not done enough with my time. This criticalness spreads into my image of myself physically too! So when I first began shooting for fashion posts it was like a special kind of torture. It gave me even more ability to nitpick at everything that I didn't like about the way I looked - my thighs too big or my face not angled enough. But really, going through that was necessary (for me) to get me to the place where I am now, in not nitpicking and hating everything that I see. When you look at something enough, you start to see the good in there and learn to love the not-so-good. You realise that yeah, you might not look great from every angle, but thats just life. You might not suit short shorts but thats ok, because they're ugly af anyway! If you stop seeking out the negatives, the positives shine through and you learn to let go and allow yourself to be much happier. It's like a weight lifting off your shoulders that you didn't realise was there.
Blazer, FIND via Amazon
Tee, FIND via Amazon
Skirt, Topshop
Hat, TK Maxx (similar)
Bag, Love Moschino (similar)
Boots, Kurt Geiger
As I mentioned, I obviously still have my fair share of bad days and don't always like how I look, but ain't that the same for all of us? I just think that, people can say posting photos of yourself on the internet so much is narcissistic, and yeah to some extent I agree, it clearly is, but when the personal benefits are (not to be dramatic) quite literally life changing, wheres the harm?
Loves. Emma.
Instagram: Sharing The Love
If you've seen one blog post complaining about Instagram and the affects of the algorithm, you've probably seen at least 10. They're everywhere. Everyone's struggling to grow, everyone's engagement is lower than ever, and when you're seeing photos from 3 days ago instead of 3 minutes ago, it's not really INSTAgram anymore is it? It's still my favourite social media, I don't think that will change. I much prefer the creativity of a photo and a witty caption to thinking up a tweet; and engagement will always be higher on there because we're all much more likely to like 100 photos a day than 100 tweets, that's just how it is. But it can be really disheartening when you have a photo that you're really proud of and people just aren't seeing it.
We shouldn't focus on the numbers - I know - but you'd be stupid to not realise how number focused the whole ~blogosphere is. You try to focus on making your content good instead of growing your accounts, but they should go hand in hand really shouldn't they.
Instead of writing a complainy post like all those you've seen, I thought I'd write about the positive impact this whole situation should be (and is) having. Because it's encouraging us all to be more involved, to seek out new accounts, to comment on the photos we adore and just generally share the love some more.
Seek out your favourite accounts
If you find that you're not seeing any photos from an account you've always loved, then go and find them! Make use of the search bar! Go through all the photos you've missed, like them and leave a comment or 2 - their photos are more likely to show up in your feed next time.
Comment, comment, comment
Not only is leaving comments on photos a great way for other accounts to find you (and for you to see who else is commenting and find their accounts!) but genuine comments can mean a lot to a person. I know I love receiving comments on my photos, especially if they're lengthy comments where someone has taken the time to read the caption! Brighten someones day with a 30 second comment.
Share the love
One thing that I'm loving to see more of lately (and which I myself need to do more often!) is sharing your favourite accounts with other people. A lot of bloggers have started doing regular shoutouts of their favourite accounts on instagram stories and I am so here for this. I've done this once (I'm very slack I know) but just receiving replies from those that I shared saying how much it meant to them was more than worth it.
So here's a few accounts you should be following for major outfit inspo (all linked, ofc!)
@imlaurenblack
Generally, we should always use a bad situation to our advantages! Make a positive out of a negative and all that!
Share your favourite accounts below!
Share your favourite accounts below!
Loves. Emma.
10 Reasons Autumn Is The Best Season
I mean, the blog name *might* be a giveaway, but if you weren't aware, autumn is my favourite time of the year. I'm not a big fan of summer and warm weather, I wrote a bit about this before, and winter can be a little too cold. Springs good, but I just think autumn is the best, ok? Crunchy leaves on the ground, hot drinks and cosy blankets: dreamy.
So I thought I'd share 10 of the many reasons why:
1. Oversized jumpers. Perfect for when I'm having a bad day with my IBS and look 7 months pregnant. Also just for being cosy or hiding the fact I cba to put a bra on, y'know!
2. All of the layering. Coats over jumpers over t-shirts; skirts and tights; scarves; I just like being cosy.
3. Hot chocolate in front of the fire, because doesn't that sound like the perfect way to end the day?
4. Home cooked meals. Not specifically an Autumn thing, I know, but I am so ready for shepherds pie and casserole and all the cosy, comforting meals.
5. Hats! Bobble hats, baker boy hats, beanies (all the B's apparently?) Perfect for bad hair days; cba hair days or just if your head gets cold!
6. Darker make-up. I might not be the biggest make-up wearer but who doesn't love a berry lip when the weather turns!
7. New series to binge watch under blankets, because is there a better way to watch a show? Helloooo Stranger Things series 2.
8. Scented candles. I have candles lit in the house all year round tbh but on cold, dark evenings a cinnamon or vanilla candle is absolutely perfect.
9. The 'back to school' feeling. I get this every September and it makes me feel motivated for a fresh start; hence the goal setting and blog scheduling planned!
10. I can finally put the electric blanket back on my bed! Not like I've been waiting for this for the past month or anything...
Wearing: Coat, Topshop (similar) - Skirt, Love Clothing (similar) - Jumper, Next (similar) - Boots, ASOS - Bag, Valentino - Hat, ASOS
Are you an autumn lover?
Loves. Emma.
Learning Your Angles
If you didn't know, I actually shoot a lot of my blog photos on a tripod. I hate to rely on other people, so why not do what I can on my own? Yeah it can be a little awkward, but honestly there is no better way to learn your angles and how you want your pictures to look. Bonus: there's nobody to see the ugly outtakes which don't make the cut (because there's always a bunch - whether you're shooting solo or have somebody behind the camera)! I always find somewhere relatively quiet, early mornings are great (while the daylight lasts!) and having an Olympus Pen I use the app on my phone to see how the shot looks before setting the self-timer!
This set of photos possibly isn't the best to accompany this post because I got halfway through shooting before my camera died! Always make sure you charge your battery before a shoot guys! But the ones I got aren't terrible so I thought I'd still share them anyway. Partly because of this amazing jumper that I had to share with you all. I picked it up in a little River Island haul that I did, (fully inspired by Charlotte!) and you can find the other pieces I picked up on the Shop My Wardrobe page!
It was actually an Instagram live that I watched with Megan Gilbride & Alex Cameron a few weeks back that inspired this post, where Alex (who, if you don't know, is a professional photographer) said that bloggers don't get enough credit for their solo tripod shots. It's how most of us started, in our back gardens with that ugly fence in the background, and sometimes it just proves the easiest way to get the photos that you want. Especially if you've got a deadline and nobody's available!
Jumper, River Island
Skirt, Primark (similar)
Hat, Peacocks (similar)
Boots, Office (similar)
As I mentioned, you not only learn ~your angles~ but just how you want your photos to look in general. And yeah, you can learn this with other people shooting too, but tbh I'm just more comfortable trying new things if there's nobody watching. Some of my favourite shoots from using my tripod include my post on the benefits of having a blog, 3 podcasts I'm loving, adding statement pieces to your wardrobe and being basic. It might mean that my photography level isn't up there with other bloggers, but this isn't a competition. As long as I'm happy with my content; not only the end result but with the whole photographing process, then I'm happy. And shooting on a tripod is something you should definitely try! Because it's not as rare as you might think; I've noticed quite a few bloggers mention that they're off to shoot some photos with their tripod!
Have you ever taken your outfit shots on a tripod? Are you a fan?
Loves. Emma.