Things I'm Not Apologising For

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Sometimes you read a blog post that resonates with you so much, that you’re inspired to write your own version. It was Chloe's post that popped up on my twitter feed and had me screaming ‘yesss that’s me too!’ in my head. So you should definitely go check her post out too. I’m constantly saying sorry, whether it’s a pre-emptive ‘sorry if this isn’t right, but..’ or an aftermath ‘sorry about that!’ it seems to be my go-to response; my most-used word. And it’s never really necessary! ‘Stop saying so much Emma’ ‘I’m sorry!’ is how it usually goes. So heres what I’m vowing to NOT apologise for anymore. I am who I am and there ain’t no changing that!

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silk vintage blouse
emma copland

Not Drinking

During (and for a year or two after) University I was at my unhealthiest, both mentally and physically. I was drinking more, going out more (probably not a lot to some people, but for me it was) and I enjoyed the feeling that I got from alcohol because it got rid of my anxieties; I didn’t care what anyone thought of me and I enjoyed myself. But I was ignoring the fact that my ‘hangovers’ came in the form of increased anxiety from not having full control over myself and people beginning to identify me as two different people: drunk Emma who was loud and sober Emma who was shy. Finally, after a situation that I found myself in when drunk last year (that I wouldn’t wish upon anyone, ever) combined with acknowledging the increased anxiety and the fact it was triggering my IBS: I quit alcohol. I’ll still have the occasional glass of wine with dinner or enjoy a cocktail with friends, but one or two drinks and that’s it. I’m much preferring to be the designated driver and not have to write the next day off with IBS cramps and next-level anxiety. I don’t care if you think I’m being boring; I’m putting myself first.

leopard print and white jeans
black duster coat
leeds blogger

Not Being Fully Vegan

There seems to be so much pressure everywhere, not even just online, about how you should be vegan (in both diet and lifestyle); use only cruelty free cosmetics and home products; reduce plastic waste; not buy fast fashion, and all the rest to help the planet. And I do agree, we should be doing everything that we can. But for some people everything they can do isn’t always everything. I use cruelty free products where I can but for the life of me can’t find vegan shampoo and conditioner that agree with my hair. I have a 90% vegan diet but IBS restrictions limit my diet a lot as it is, so if I want a day ‘off’ then I will do. I’m also just a bit selfish and if I want a designer handbag that happens to be leather then I might get it; I don’t buy other leather, suede or wool products. We just need to remember that every little bit, collectively, is making a difference. Putting pressure on people will never help and I won’t apologise for enjoying a cheese and marmite toastie and a Valentino bag.

transitional layering
styling white jeans
belt buckle detail

Being A Blogger

Maybe it’s that I don’t really talk about my blog, but I’ve been quite lucky thus far in escaping the eye-rolls and general negative attitude towards it! The only people who I ever ask to take photos for me are fellow bloggers or my mum; and my mum is the most supportive person EVER so there’s no bad reaction there. If I’m out for food with friends, I don’t make them wait while I take photos of the food, I just eat it. So although it’s not me apologising, I guess it shows that I just keep having a blog ‘quiet’ and, why? It’s nothing that I’m ashamed of and I will never apologise for it, so maybe I should be embracing it more than I do at the moment!

white kick flare jeans
streetstyle
stella McCartney flatforms

Being Awkward Around New People

The most important one to me. I could’ve just titled this ‘being me’ because being awkward is essentially who I am, but I don’t want to apologise for who I am anymore. For as long as I can remember, I’ve had best friends who ‘take over’ for me on the social front; when I’m being shy and my anxiety is high, I struggle introducing myself to new people or even talking to people who I already know, so having friends who understand and more than make up for the chat makes life 10x easier. But when you’re 21 and faced with a team of rugby players (whose house you’re in!) asking who you are, clamming up and running away doesn't look very good does it. And then I end up apologising later and I just continually get into these cycles. But this is just the way that I am; I’ve accepted it and everyone else should too. I’m no longer going to apologise for not being able to strike up a conversation when meeting new people. I’m no longer going to apologise for struggling to hold a conversation.
Loves. Emma.

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